Thursday, April 06, 2006

I ain't THAT lonely

Jeebus. You guys.

Anyone out there tried online dating? I can't believe I'm actually doing this, but I'm also certain it will provide great fodder for this site. Thought it would be a good thing to try dating outside my field - and Mum would be so happy if I didn't end up with a fellow penniless performer.


I signed up a few days ago for a well-known service that advertises all over New York. I wasn't expecting much, and it has about met those expectations - most interested parties have either been too old (I've dated men 8-10 years older, but 51?? No), not attractive to me (at least, not from what I could tell of their grainy, shot-by-the-Blair-Witch-camera-crew pictures), or did not appear to have a strong grasp of grammar, spelling or usage. Fellas, in a word: proofread.

I did meet one fellow who appears promising. He uses too many smiley faces and unnecessary quotes, but he's attractive, speaks more than one language, rides a Harley, and can spell. Unfortunately, I haven't heard from him in few days...

So today, I thought I'd be proactive and contact some locals. I ran across a profile/picture I liked, emailed the author, and we began a lively IM conversation. Oh sure, he made one little joke about sex slaves... and then wouldn't drop it... and then asked me if I was submissive...


Then, I mentioned I had cats, and received a vitriolic spew about them. I replied that he seemed bitter.

"oh no i don't hate cats i just think they're pieces of shit from hell."

Ooookay then. Was this man actually thinking I would find this attractive?

Apparently so, as this was his next line:

"so do you want to come over so I can cage and fuck you?"

I think it is to my credit that I laughed out loud - in his pictures, this kid looks like a cherub. I replied:

"Moving a little fast there, buckaroo. I think we want different things."

And then I blocked his creepy pipsqueak ass.


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posted by Addy @ 4/06/2006 05:22:00 PM |


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