Thursday, March 02, 2006

Oh Jeebus, not again


I'm the new girl, Black Sheepish. ["Hi, Black Sheepish!"] You can check out my profile and save us both a little time, as far as introductions... Let's get down to the nitty gritty.

So, yesterday I get this email from MamaSheepish:

Hi Blackie,

I've been doing a lot of worrying lately (because of my brother) and I'm hoping you will come up with a Plan B in case the acting thing doesn't work out as a #1 career for you.
Love Old Worry Wart MOM


The "brother" (my uncle) is 60-something and lives with his mom (my grandmother), partially so he can take care of her (which he doesn't, much), but mostly because he has no where else to live. He also does not appear to have a job - he apparently engages in "online investing" from home, but for all we in the family know of his business, it could be a euphemism for "internet poker-playing". He has, and continues to have, access to my grandmother's assets and the considerable pension left her by my grandfather, and appears to be using them up at an alarming rate. He also has type 2 diabetes and is pretty bad shape. He's unmarried, has a girlfriend who seems nice, but doesn't seem to care that his house is a mess that is currently moving from the oh dear to the ew phase, or that he is ruining his health with poor eating habits (she's a nurse).

Very, very sad, this whole thing.

MamaSheepish is afraid this will happen to me. Hence the note, which is approximately 401,256 of ∞ on the same subject. Now, mom is a constant fretter, but every few months her worry levels spike and I have had to deal with it. For 9 years. And it. Gets. Old.

But the worst part? Is that I'm afraid that this could happen to me too. Now on some level, I know that this is MamaSheepish pushing those buttons she installed. Nevertheless, they's pushed; every time I get a note like this, I'm sent into a spiral of "How do I answer this?"/"Should I answer this?"/"What if she's right?" I keep feeling that she expects an answer out of me, now, about how I intend to live the rest of my life... and I can barely keep up with day-to-day things.

I don't want to make life decisions based on fear.

(I promise all my posts will not be this heavy)


posted by Addy @ 3/02/2006 10:46:00 AM |


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